Frequently Asked Questions

1. How long has ASAWA been on the web?

Eight years, off and on.  Continuously for the last 6. Yes, we survived the dot.com implosion!

2.  How many hits/visitors do you get?  

We get about 12 million hits per month, or 145,000 visitors, and our forum has over 6,000 members and 180,000 posts!  

3.  Can you help me with immigration questions?  

No.  I’ve not touched an immigration form in twelve years, and the law has changed a lot since then.  Instead of writing me, you’d be much safer either visiting the ASAWA forum's Immigration community (view guidelines HERE).  We've got thousands of men and women as members, all at different stages of the process, and I’ve yet to see a question go unanswered there.  It's a non-commercial site and private. No fees, no popup ads. 

4.  Can you add my niece's (sister's, etc.) address to your service?  Can you give or sell me the address of a Filipina?  

I don’t operate an introduction service and so I can’t, unfortunately, arrange for you to find the husband or wife of your dreams.  I can’t post your want-ad or find a woman for you, since my policy here is "not to make marriages to Filipinas, but to make marriages to Filipinas better." . 

5.  Can you offer me some advice?  

Sorry, not any more. While I have for years done my best to tackle visitor's questions, I've found that work and my home life pretty much prohibit me from responding to such queries in a timely manner, and I hate to offend anyone.  It often took me a week or longer to respond to an email. If you have any really pressing questions about the Philippines (history, culture, food, language...) or Filipinas (psychology, mannerisms, beliefs…), you should considering joining the ASAWA forum at www.asawa.org/asawa .  

6.  Why do you generalize about Filipinas, when every human being is unique?  

Well, I do have to make some generalizations during my discussions, but obviously I do not mean to imply that all people of a certain nationality or ethnicity are the same.  If I were unable to generalize, however, I would need a site that contained about one hundred million pages to discuss Filipinas alone - about a page per Filipina, and even that wouldn't suffice.  So generalities are only practical in this medium. Also, don't take my words as law, please!  Take them only as a starting point and develop your own opinions from there.   

7. It seems to me that some of your pages (like, "So You Want to Marry a Filipina...") try to discourage me from marrying a Filipina, while others offer me advice on how to do it.  Why is that?  

I firmly believe that marriage to a Filipina is a wonderful thing and a great decision for most American men IF they are inclined to pursue such relationships.  I receive a surprising amount of email from visitors who want to know why I'm so critical of such relationships and Filipinas (?!).  The fact is that I am a great admirer of Filipinas and the Philippine people, and I totally support Fil-West marriages.  I do, however, try to make potential husbands stop and think a little bit about what they're doing.  A multicultural relationship is unlike a unicultural relationship in a lot of ways, and some preparation is called for.  It is better for both the prospective husband and wife to address these issues BEFORE the marriage instead of afterwards.  It's just smart.  Fortunately, the diversity of culture will normally enrich such a marriage, not detract from it, and almost every Fil-West couple I know is very deeply in love.